Being centered

I am going through one of those 'god-why-do-I-exist' phases again! Imagine a day like this
I wake up late (already a bad sign), take an auto to office,
then I realise I forgot my
wallet at home. Thankfully the auto guy is nice enough to accept the fare next day, so takes my phone number.
Get to work. Make stupid mistakes, and was threatened to get fired 3 times. Finally I get chucked out of making the pages (I work for a newspaper). And at this point I just observe how I feel. Things going wrong is not really big deal for me, by now, I am a self confessed expert at it. But then inevitably I always go into 'this-always-happens-to-me', or 'everyone's-here-to-give-me-a-hard-time' mode.
But today, as my boss screamed on top of her voice so that the whole office could hear how badly I screwed up, I could just detach myself and watch what was happening and just smile (internally).
And a strange calmness enveloped me. And then I felt just empty, blank.

And then a realisation of how impermanent each situation is hits me. And how empty they feel as they fade away in the magnitude of time. And every time I get back to this emptiness, I get in touch with truth. As I walk back from work to home, in the busy MG road every single day, I feel, I am at the centre, and events, happenings, emotions..are all revolving around me. While I remain rooted, untouched yet ephemeral.

Tender lovin care

The shop and restaurant windows are full of pink and red heart shaped balloons, the Brigade road it is swarming with couple holding hands.
On one hand we have Muthalik's army, Ram sena, crusading against a cause that is so a non-issue, and on the other hand we have these people (those against Ram sena) making an issue out a non-issue of a non-issue. The amount of debate that this has sparked off in Bangalore, is ridicules. I mean doesn't nation of 1.5 billion have better things to talk about. If couples want to hold hands, let them, and if Muthalik has made some retarded proclamations, let him. Seriously we have better things to worry about. Like:

1) Global warming- Apart from the fact that it has been reduced into a glamorous word in the vocabulary of beauty pageant contestants, It is a REAL PROBLEM. And oh we didn't do much, by being a Non Vegetarian, we only contribute towards 27% of global warming.

2) National Security- Right around the time last year when the media warped up the inconsequential 'Arushi murder case', India was invaded by China three times!

3)Naxalism-is the single biggest challenge that India faces in the next decade. The communist rule is weakening India internally by funding naxalites, and externally through maoist attacks from across the borders. In poor villages in India, especially the UP-north east belt, the naxalism is so rampant, that children of impoverished villages aspire to be naxalites in order to combat extreme poverty.

4)Politics- Our country is being run by a bunch of senile freaks, who still follow the legacy left by British- divide and rule in order to win vote banks. How can you blame them, the young educated population of India, is too busy to vote (myself included) but not to busy to complain.

5)Education system-Its about time we read 'real history' of India in our text-books, rather than suppressing our true history, where stuff like Jaliawala Bagh murder just gets a two line mention.

6) Terrorism- The basic intolerance for other religious and cultural ideologies, and this could include something as stupid as the Ram sena attacks. In the name of preservation of cultural heritage, gross violation of human rights and human values are being committed.

So its my sincere request for the youth of this nation to get into some action. Our country, our world, our environment is crying out for some love and affection. And if we focus our energies there instead of retarded (non)issues created by sensationalist media (I know I am a part of it),
This Blog has been inspired by Bawa's blog, on how, its out Nation that needs utmost TLC.
Here are some of the ways to get started

1. Attend the YES!+ workshop (contact me for details)
2. Register at http://www.jaagore.com/, to Vote
3. Read up on real Indian history on Francios's website
4. Become a vegetarian (no arguments, just do your research)

Now that's not a bad start, if you've checked the above on your to do list, its time to get others on the bandwagon. Else trust me, you'll be stuck behind a seedy screen your whole life, with your only significant contribution after reading this blog being increasing the traffic rate on google.

Why I did not post for so long

I know its been ages....and its about time I do the official sri ganesh of posting my first blog this year. Here are some of the significant events, that kept me too busy to blog the past month

1. Krishna's (my brother) visit , twice to the city, and he is now a proud owner of an ipod 160GB classic

2.My first YES!+ course in Bangalore Indira Nagar (will upload pics soon)

3. Interviewed : Emraan Hashmi, Neha Dhupia, and a couple of other's you wouldnt recognise

4. Attended my college alumni meet (and gave a brilliant speech) and was

5. Called as guest faculty to teach feature writing at SSCMS, and gave my first lecture.

6. Road trip from Coimbatore to Bangalore via Ooty and Bandipur national reserve with Avinash and Sadie, where we spotted Elephants, Deers and Peacocks.

7. And lastly and most significantly went for Reema's wedding yesterday. Got really senti..Its weird to see you best friend getting married, acting all grown up and propah!

Is my life happening or what! but that does not excuse me from going absconding from my own blog. All of the above events deserve an individual post dedicated to them. And that's what I intend to do in the coming days, which just seem to get busier

1. YES!+ course in Koramangala, Indian Heritage centre, 12th- 18th feb

2. Guitar lessons with Sahil

3. Lectures as guest faculty twice a week

4. Mahashivratri on 23rd Feb at kollam with Guruji.

I cant bear to go on anymore, seem like I'm on a verge of a panic attack. Why cant a day have more than 24 hours!

Moving on

Moved into a new house at JP nagar second phase,

And it still hasn't sunk in that i'm here for good. A part of me still feels like i'm on an

extended holiday, and will go back to Hyderabad.

This new house, the new job...all feels pretty unreal to me.

Walking the talk, being a journalist

Its been 5 days since i’ve Joined Deccan Herald, and am still reeling in a bit of culture shock.
Coming from TOI, which is more of a corporate setup rather than a newsroom, this place had overwhelmed me!

I mean the place even smells like old newspapers (not that I am complaining)

The first thing I noticed here are the people. I mean we could easily have a fancy dress competition for the most authentic journalist look. We have 3 Barkha Dutt lookalikes, one Sagarika Ghosh, two Sreenivasan Jains. It looks like they go through great lengths to painfully ‘create’ the journo look. I mean, how tacky! the signature jhola, jute earring (a la barkha dutt)if you look carefully enough, you’ll find that even the expressions on their faces match.
I mean its quiet amusing, the guys, uh....I think there is an unwritten rule that all men journalist have to be below 5’7 to qualify for the job, unfortunate for me (I happen to be 5'7) . There are always exceptions though.

Press conferences: The press kit and press lunch....the first PC I attended in Blore, I got a coffee maker for just having to write 150 words, and not to mention the brilliant lunch at Leela palace.

And I kinda enjoy the way PR guys suck up to journalists, and then we can act all hoity toity for having the talent of putting sensible sentences together (believe me, 90% of the population can't)

What I love about Bangalore is that it's so happening! I do more assignments and stories in a day than I used to do in a week!

In the beginning I sorely missed my private cubicle at TOI, then I realised that there is so much to do, that I don't need a private cubicle to stop getting caught taking a nap.

And oh, I love the 3 o'clock tea and snacks cart that comes in proper airlines style. Ok maybe Metrolife isn't the best metro supplement Bangalore, I mean not yet...but now that I am here, am sure things will change.

Reporting from Bangalore bureau, Madhuri Kalyan, Metrolife, Deccan Herald.

Ayurvedic concepts

Its about 7 am in the morning, still unearthly in madhuriland......but I just cant resist posting!

have been pretty sick past few days, with my respiratory and digestive system screwed up (cold and stomach ache), have been taking ayurvedic treatments, these weird green gooey pastes, and am not sure if I am getting better because of the medicine or because my body is stunned by the shock treatment subjected due to the disgusting taste.

My eating habits sure have taken a toll this past month, not that it was ever brilliant. So I get to swallow ayurvedic preparation specifically tailor made so that you wont ever fall into trap of eating for 'taste'.

And I have ashram kitchen food to top off the effect, thank god for small mercies like 'canteen'.

On my check list of not to eat these were the things included by my ayurveda doc

Ice creams

chocolates

sweets

milk products

Fried stuff

I just cant bear to go on as I am on the verge of nervous breakdown!

I mean how cruel is this!

So yesterday my mom came back from Bihar, after a month, and brought specialty besen ke laddu, and I could not make her feel bad by refusing....then there were Tirupati prasadam (of course prasad is not counted as calories), and Lindt-Lindor, which Sampath got from half way around the world. And I haven't even met Goli, who's got Belgian choco's from Brussels.....

Wow..its a wonder that my digestive system hasn't collapsed. Guess that gooey ayurvedic paste actually works, even though it makes you wish you never had taste buds.

I am now a totally fan of ayurveda, next time I might actually try them with the diet restrictions.

PS: According to Ayurveda, you need to fallow a healthy daily routine called 'dinacharya' and the fact that i'm up so early and ready for meditation shows that I am on the right track to ayurvedic enlightenment!

Confessions of an Ashramite

Akin to a self sufficient capsule, in idyllic environs, you loose count days, and time simply dissolves.

Living in an ashram, away from the chaotic hustle bustle of the city life was something I took for granted. Ever since my parents moved here a year ago, I've made countless trips.

I remember the first sight of ashram, almost five years ago, the first glimpse of the majestic Vishalakshi Mandap, proudly standing against the backdrop of a clear sky, with a dome that glistens in the sunlight, and changes color at night. It looked as if it was something out of dreams.

And then over the years, with numerous satsangs with the master in the VM, and the meditation sessions in His presence. The sanctity of the place only increased in my eyes. And now, I feel almost as if I have grown up in this ashram, as the world outside ceases to exist the moment I step in here. 

Life before the day I stepped into this enchanted land has slowly faded into oblivion. Every step I walk here feels sacred. Everything seems to take on an ethereal quality here. The colors seem more intense, music, more melodious, its as if mother nature is dressed in her best attire to please her lord.

Calm and meditative, yet alive and kicking. I've lost count of the time I've seen teary-eyed people, wishing they didnt have to ever leave this place. 

Home is where you come back to nature, where you dont have to pretend anymore, where you never need to prove anything.

Its where you get the deepest rest. Its where no matter how much you grow up, you still get taken care off like a child. 

Sometimes its not easy to accept things which are so blatantly natural, that truth shines from every pore of it. I got so accustomed to living in a artificial and pretentious world, that there were times when I felt uncomfortable, times when I felt my identity dissolved, times when I felt like rebelling.

And then I felt a presence, so comforting, so unconditional, that I knew, no matter what I did, I will always be taken care of. And those insecurities that lash on, only makes me stronger by the day, so that when I go outside, to take on the world, I would be able to extend the same unconditional love and comfort to those not as fortunate as me.

Ashram....even a simple act like typing this post in its space feels divine. 

Jai gurudev!